As parents, we all hope that our children will grow to become caring, kind and compassionate adults, but in order to maximise the chances of this happening, it’s important to introduce them to the concept of empathy from as early an age as possible. This isn’t always easy with younger children as the idea is quite a complex one for young minds to grasp, but empathy is still something that can start being developed from an early age. For example, you can start by asking them basic questions such as, “How would you feel if that were you?” as this encourages them to start thinking about the thoughts and feelings of others, even if they’re not quite ready to fully understand the meaning of empathy.

With older children, we can ask them a series of more in-depth questions to help them understand and most importantly, care about the emotions and experiences of others. For example a good way to open the conversation is by saying, “What might it be like to be that person for a day?” It’s important to use both positive and negative examples as this won’t be as effective if you only do it in order to prove a point about your child’s misbehaviour, such as if they’ve been rude to someone and you want to make them feel ashamed. Once they’re in ‘thinking mode’, you can then follow it up with more questions such as “If you had that same experience, do you think it would make you feel happy or upset?” or “If you were put in that position, do you think you’d react in the same way?”

Encouraging your children to think about the experiences and emotions of those around them not only helps them to develop a sense of empathy, but having esteem for others also helps them to breed higher esteem for themselves in the long-term.

These are just a few examples of our Best of Parenting Tools. You can find more ideas and solutions to typical parenting challenges in our book ‘Kids Don’t Come With a Manual – The Essential Guide to a Happy Family Life‘.