Sharing The Best Resources & Tools

CAROLE AND NADIM SAAD, CO-FOUNDERS OF BEST OF PARENTING

As the parents of three children, struggling like so many others to find a balanced and effective parenting style, we turned away from all the parenting fads and studied the hard scientific evidence on what really works. The techniques we learnt were so life changing, yet so straightforward, that we made it our mission to convert them into powerful step by step tools and make them available to parents world over. Read more about the philosophy behind Best of Parenting.

Sharing The Best Resources & Tools

CAROLE AND NADIM SAAD, CO-FOUNDERS OF BEST OF PARENTING

As the parents of three children, struggling like so many others to find a balanced and effective parenting style, we turned away from all the parenting fads and studied the hard scientific evidence on what really works. The techniques we learnt were so life changing, yet so straightforward, that we made it our mission to convert them into powerful step by step tools and make them available to parents world over. Read more about the philosophy behind Best of Parenting.

Hitting

January 1st, 2014 | Defiance | 3 to 6 years | Short Tips and Quotes | Negative Behaviour

When our children ‘lash out’ it is usually because they either feel frustrated or are over excited (or because they are copying what they see on screen). That said children are never too young to learn that violence should never be an option!

Here is a sample of some of our easy and effective tools for solving this issue

This works really well:

SET A RULE:

  • Limits are essential for children but need to be set in a non-confrontational way.
  • We should set rules using the third person (making them sound less like reprimands) and try to keep the statement positive.
  • For example: “It is not ok to use violence in this house. Children who hit cannot continue playing with their family and friends.”
  • When we announce a new rule we should do it with empathy, ideally explaining why it needs to be there.  Try not to set rules during a confrontation or an argument with your child!

 Here is another suggestion:

GIVE A CHOICE:

  • When children are given choices they move from ‘opposition mode’ into ‘thinking mode’, and become interested in listening rather than arguing.
  • Try to limit the options to two and make sure that they appeal to you, as well as your child!

Then you could try:

LOGICAL CONSEQUENCE:

  • If/when our child knowingly breaks a rule, we can then deliver a related “consequence” with empathy (rather than a straightforward punishment).
  • So for example, if your child hits someone else whilst knowing that it is against the rules say to him or her: “ This is so sad, you’ve hit someone, so we will have to leave now”.
  • Enforcing logical consequences shows our children that rules are there to be respected, not rubbished.
  • This tool may initially get a strong reaction from your children, but usually after implementing a few clear consequences (with empathy and without anger!), they will understand why rules are there to be respected and followed.

 

These are just a few examples of our Best of Parenting Tools. You can find more ideas and solutions to typical parenting challenges in our book ‘Kids Don’t Come With a Manual – The Essential Guide to a Happy Family Life‘. 

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Hitting

January 1st, 2014 | Defiance | 3 to 6 years | Negative Behaviour

When our children ‘lash out’ it is usually because they either feel frustrated or are over excited (or because they are copying what they see on screen). That said children are never too young to learn that violence should never be an option!

Here is a sample of some of our easy and effective tools for solving this issue

This works really well:

SET A RULE:

  • Limits are essential for children but need to be set in a non-confrontational way.
  • We should set rules using the third person (making them sound less like reprimands) and try to keep the statement positive.
  • For example: “It is not ok to use violence in this house. Children who hit cannot continue playing with their family and friends.”
  • When we announce a new rule we should do it with empathy, ideally explaining why it needs to be there.  Try not to set rules during a confrontation or an argument with your child!

 Here is another suggestion:

GIVE A CHOICE:

  • When children are given choices they move from ‘opposition mode’ into ‘thinking mode’, and become interested in listening rather than arguing.
  • Try to limit the options to two and make sure that they appeal to you, as well as your child!

Then you could try:

LOGICAL CONSEQUENCE:

  • If/when our child knowingly breaks a rule, we can then deliver a related “consequence” with empathy (rather than a straightforward punishment).
  • So for example, if your child hits someone else whilst knowing that it is against the rules say to him or her: “ This is so sad, you’ve hit someone, so we will have to leave now”.
  • Enforcing logical consequences shows our children that rules are there to be respected, not rubbished.
  • This tool may initially get a strong reaction from your children, but usually after implementing a few clear consequences (with empathy and without anger!), they will understand why rules are there to be respected and followed.

 

These are just a few examples of our Best of Parenting Tools. You can find more ideas and solutions to typical parenting challenges in our book ‘Kids Don’t Come With a Manual – The Essential Guide to a Happy Family Life‘. 

Loading...

Hitting

January 1st, 2014 | Defiance | 3 to 6 years | Short Tips and Quotes | Negative Behaviour

When our children ‘lash out’ it is usually because they either feel frustrated or are over excited (or because they are copying what they see on screen). That said children are never too young to learn that violence should never be an option!

Here is a sample of some of our easy and effective tools for solving this issue

This works really well:

SET A RULE:

  • Limits are essential for children but need to be set in a non-confrontational way.
  • We should set rules using the third person (making them sound less like reprimands) and try to keep the statement positive.
  • For example: “It is not ok to use violence in this house. Children who hit cannot continue playing with their family and friends.”
  • When we announce a new rule we should do it with empathy, ideally explaining why it needs to be there.  Try not to set rules during a confrontation or an argument with your child!

 Here is another suggestion:

GIVE A CHOICE:

  • When children are given choices they move from ‘opposition mode’ into ‘thinking mode’, and become interested in listening rather than arguing.
  • Try to limit the options to two and make sure that they appeal to you, as well as your child!

Then you could try:

LOGICAL CONSEQUENCE:

  • If/when our child knowingly breaks a rule, we can then deliver a related “consequence” with empathy (rather than a straightforward punishment).
  • So for example, if your child hits someone else whilst knowing that it is against the rules say to him or her: “ This is so sad, you’ve hit someone, so we will have to leave now”.
  • Enforcing logical consequences shows our children that rules are there to be respected, not rubbished.
  • This tool may initially get a strong reaction from your children, but usually after implementing a few clear consequences (with empathy and without anger!), they will understand why rules are there to be respected and followed.

 

These are just a few examples of our Best of Parenting Tools. You can find more ideas and solutions to typical parenting challenges in our book ‘Kids Don’t Come With a Manual – The Essential Guide to a Happy Family Life‘. 

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