Sharing The Best Resources & Tools

CAROLE AND NADIM SAAD, CO-FOUNDERS OF BEST OF PARENTING

As the parents of three children, struggling like so many others to find a balanced and effective parenting style, we turned away from all the parenting fads and studied the hard scientific evidence on what really works. The techniques we learnt were so life changing, yet so straightforward, that we made it our mission to convert them into powerful step by step tools and make them available to parents world over. Read more about the philosophy behind Best of Parenting.

Sharing The Best Resources & Tools

CAROLE AND NADIM SAAD, CO-FOUNDERS OF BEST OF PARENTING

As the parents of three children, struggling like so many others to find a balanced and effective parenting style, we turned away from all the parenting fads and studied the hard scientific evidence on what really works. The techniques we learnt were so life changing, yet so straightforward, that we made it our mission to convert them into powerful step by step tools and make them available to parents world over. Read more about the philosophy behind Best of Parenting.

My child is ignoring me

January 2nd, 2014 | Defiance | 3 to 6 years | Short Tips and Quotes |

Being ignored is infuriating! Yet when our children ignore us it is usually because they want to test the amount of control they have over the world around them. It’s our response to them that can teach them a better way of communicating.

Here is a sample of some of our easy and effective tools for solving this issue

This works really well:

RESPECTFUL COMMUNICATION:

  • Speaking to a child by getting down to his or her level, rather than screaming an order from a distance (which we all do from time to time!) is highly effective.
  • If we want to be even more effective, we can try whispering.
  • ‘Modelling’ respectful communication, even when our children are being rude, teaches a better alternative to their behaviour.

Here is another suggestion:

“I” STATEMENT:

  • Make a non-negotiable statement  that you are able to enforce.
  • For example: tell your child gently, “I listen to children who listen to me”.
  • Your “I” Statement needs to start with an “I” or “my” (and if speaking for the family or couple, with a “we” or “our”).
  • If your child still refuses to listen to you, repeat your statement and appear to  ignore him or her for a little while.

And here is another suggestion:

PROBLEM SOLVING:

  • When we have a problem with our child’s behaviour we need to guide him or her to understand exactly what the problem is. So at a later time, once everyone has cooled down first outline why his or her behaviour was problematic.
  • Go on to explain how your child’s ignoring you made you feel, using an “I feel” Message.
  • You can then encourage your child to help find a solution to prevent the problem from re-occurring.
  • For example:  ”When you appear to ignore me, I feel disrespected and upset… What could we do to make sure this doesn’t happen again?”

 

These are just a few examples of our Best of Parenting Tools. You can find more ideas and solutions to typical parenting challenges in our book ‘Kids Don’t Come With a Manual – The Essential Guide to a Happy Family Life‘. 

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My child is ignoring me

January 2nd, 2014 | Defiance | 3 to 6 years |

Being ignored is infuriating! Yet when our children ignore us it is usually because they want to test the amount of control they have over the world around them. It’s our response to them that can teach them a better way of communicating.

Here is a sample of some of our easy and effective tools for solving this issue

This works really well:

RESPECTFUL COMMUNICATION:

  • Speaking to a child by getting down to his or her level, rather than screaming an order from a distance (which we all do from time to time!) is highly effective.
  • If we want to be even more effective, we can try whispering.
  • ‘Modelling’ respectful communication, even when our children are being rude, teaches a better alternative to their behaviour.

Here is another suggestion:

“I” STATEMENT:

  • Make a non-negotiable statement  that you are able to enforce.
  • For example: tell your child gently, “I listen to children who listen to me”.
  • Your “I” Statement needs to start with an “I” or “my” (and if speaking for the family or couple, with a “we” or “our”).
  • If your child still refuses to listen to you, repeat your statement and appear to  ignore him or her for a little while.

And here is another suggestion:

PROBLEM SOLVING:

  • When we have a problem with our child’s behaviour we need to guide him or her to understand exactly what the problem is. So at a later time, once everyone has cooled down first outline why his or her behaviour was problematic.
  • Go on to explain how your child’s ignoring you made you feel, using an “I feel” Message.
  • You can then encourage your child to help find a solution to prevent the problem from re-occurring.
  • For example:  ”When you appear to ignore me, I feel disrespected and upset… What could we do to make sure this doesn’t happen again?”

 

These are just a few examples of our Best of Parenting Tools. You can find more ideas and solutions to typical parenting challenges in our book ‘Kids Don’t Come With a Manual – The Essential Guide to a Happy Family Life‘. 

Loading...

My child is ignoring me

January 2nd, 2014 | Defiance | 3 to 6 years | Short Tips and Quotes |

Being ignored is infuriating! Yet when our children ignore us it is usually because they want to test the amount of control they have over the world around them. It’s our response to them that can teach them a better way of communicating.

Here is a sample of some of our easy and effective tools for solving this issue

This works really well:

RESPECTFUL COMMUNICATION:

  • Speaking to a child by getting down to his or her level, rather than screaming an order from a distance (which we all do from time to time!) is highly effective.
  • If we want to be even more effective, we can try whispering.
  • ‘Modelling’ respectful communication, even when our children are being rude, teaches a better alternative to their behaviour.

Here is another suggestion:

“I” STATEMENT:

  • Make a non-negotiable statement  that you are able to enforce.
  • For example: tell your child gently, “I listen to children who listen to me”.
  • Your “I” Statement needs to start with an “I” or “my” (and if speaking for the family or couple, with a “we” or “our”).
  • If your child still refuses to listen to you, repeat your statement and appear to  ignore him or her for a little while.

And here is another suggestion:

PROBLEM SOLVING:

  • When we have a problem with our child’s behaviour we need to guide him or her to understand exactly what the problem is. So at a later time, once everyone has cooled down first outline why his or her behaviour was problematic.
  • Go on to explain how your child’s ignoring you made you feel, using an “I feel” Message.
  • You can then encourage your child to help find a solution to prevent the problem from re-occurring.
  • For example:  ”When you appear to ignore me, I feel disrespected and upset… What could we do to make sure this doesn’t happen again?”

 

These are just a few examples of our Best of Parenting Tools. You can find more ideas and solutions to typical parenting challenges in our book ‘Kids Don’t Come With a Manual – The Essential Guide to a Happy Family Life‘. 

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Related articles: