There’s no doubt that children’s sleep issues can rule our lives. But the key to dealing with a child’s reluctance to sleep lies in understanding what has caused this problem, and then working on it together.
Here is a sample of some of our easy and effective tools for solving this issue.
This works really well:
PLAN AHEAD:
- Devise a ‘going to sleep’ ritual with your child (a prayer, poem or lullaby often helps calm a child).
- Once you both start adhering to this new ritual it will soon become the ‘boss’ to be obeyed, rather than you.
- Planning ahead, particularly if you are able to do it together, can take the ‘heat’ out of your child’s sleep issues and alleviate any anxiety which might be getting in the way of drowsiness.
Here is another suggestion:
SET A RULE:
- Explain to your child the rule it needs to follow
- For example:. “The new rule is: It is now ‘the grown ups time’ and children need to remain in their room, even if they decide not to sleep immediately.”
- As long as children don’t come out of their room, it may be an option to let them go to sleep a bit later if they wish to. Or to wake at the usual time so that they feel the result of their decision, ie feeling tired the next day.
However, we need to ensure that our children don’t have access to screens, and that they understand that they mustn’t leave their room.
Here is another suggestion:
“I” STATEMENT:
- Being aware of what you can control, versus what you would like to control, make a statement that you can and will enforce.
- For example: “I read stories to children who go to bed” or “In our house children are quiet after the lights are turned off.”
- Your statement needs to start with “I” or “my” (and if speaking for the family or couple, it starts with “we” or “our”.
- At first your child might be surprised, or even frustrated by your categorical statement. But underneath it all he or she will appreciate the clarity of these boundaries.
These are just a few examples of our Best of Parenting Tools. You can find more ideas and solutions to typical parenting challenges in our book ‘Kids Don’t Come With a Manual – The Essential Guide to a Happy Family Life‘.