When you ask your child “How was school today?”, typically your child will respond with “It was fine” or “Okay”. However, if you really want your child to open up with you and share their feelings, try asking them more specific questions as this is far more likely to illicit a ‘real’ response.

Here are some effective alternatives:

“What was your best moment at school today? (Or what was your worst moment at school today?)

When were you the happiest today?

What part of the day do you look forward to? What part of the day do you dread?

Who did you help today? Who helped you today?

Once they start speaking, it’s essential that you allow them to speak freely and that you refrain from judgement. If they share something that’s bothering them, resist the urge to ‘swoop’ in and try to fix things for them. Instead use the ‘Active listening’ tool: repeat what they have told you by summarising it or just try and put a name to their feeling. This will make them want to share even more in future.

Inspirational Quotes:

“One of the most sincere forms of respect is actually listening to what another has to say”. – Bryant H. McGill

“When people talk, listen completely. Most people never listen.” ― Ernest Hemingway

These are just a few examples of our Best of Parenting Tools. You can find more ideas and solutions to typical parenting challenges in our book ‘Kids Don’t Come With a Manual – The Essential Guide to a Happy Family Life‘.